My life right now!!

It’s amazing how fast life can throw you some whirlwinds that turn into tornadoes!! I am struggling with so many things right now. I find myself on my knees begging Heavenly Father for help more times than not. I have always felt bad asking my parents for help or anyone else for that matter. I have always been an independent girl who does it all by myself, kinda like a toddler who wont let Mom help them anymore. So when I have to ask Heavenly Father for help it makes me feel so bad. But most of the time this is the only way for me to feel peace. I wish he could somehow answer some of my prayers with a loud and clear answer because I need it loud and clear. I feel like maybe I have been wrong in some of the answers I thought he sent. I honestly am trying my very best and giving life all I have to give. Somedays I look back and wonder how I made it out alive that day because I pushed myself so hard. I am so blessed to have four wonderful children who are so good to me, they bring me so much joy. I find myself questioning if I am a good enough Mom for them, I want to be the very best I can for them. I am so lucky that they remind me always that they love me!! This picks me up on a day I have fallen and I can get back up and keep going. Heavenly Father knew I needed them in my life. I think when my kids tell me that they love me it reminds me how much my Heavenly Father loves me as well. Life is hard, it has never been easy, but I am learning so much from it. There are good people in my life who are like angels to me and then there are people who I just let fall off of me kinda like the story of the wemicks. I love that story. It is about not letting others hurt you and not letting what they say stick to you, instead you just let it fall off. I know that life can always get worse so I am always grateful for my trials, but at times I feel like it is so heavy on my back that I just want them to go away. I don’t like this time of year as it is, it always gets me down, so I love it when the sun shines through my house, it brightens my spirits. I am thankful for my testimony of the gospel, I am so blessed because of it. I am so thankful that Heavenly Father is always by my side, I am also thankful for a new day to start over and pray for the very best.