Welcome Home Mommy!

I am home, it feels so good to be home. What an adventure that was and still is for me. I will start at the beginning with dropping my kids off at my parent’s house Sunday..wow now that was hard. I don’t understand how people leave their kids for a week to go on a cruise, don’t sign me up for that I would not think that was fun at all. My little boy kept looking at me like where are you going Mommy, it was horrible. So the goodbye was hard and the drive to Utah was hard, I cried all the way there, Josh didn’t know what to do with me. So we get to My Aunt Judy’s house and they were so sweet to us and they put me in a better mood. My Uncle Jerry had this same surgery years ago so he was giving me all kinds of stories and actually was pretty funny to listen to. I was so grateful for them to let us stay with them before and after surgery, Judy took good care of me. We had a nice talk with them Sunday night and then Jerry gave me a wonderful priesthood blessing about having peace and a speedy recovery. It was just what I needed and it helped me feel so much better. I had a few blessings before along my journey through this and another one just helped that much more. So we went to bed and there was no sleep for me, I was so nervous that I only got maybe an hour or 45 minutes of sleep. I woke up and got ready and we were out the door at 5:30 a.m. My Aunt Judy rode with us and it was so nice to have her there, she was always helping me to see the bright side of everything. So Josh and Judy were sitting in the room where they were getting me ready for surgery and the anesthesiologist came in to start the IV and they were explaining everything to me about how I would not be breathing and they would breath for me….O my gosh I was done at this point!! I looked at Josh and Judy and I wanted out of there so they told them to give me something now to put me to sleep, well they must have pushed something in that IV right then because I don’t remember even saying goodbye to them. So that picture Judy took on the last post…um ya I was out of it and I don’t remember asking her to take that :) But thanks Judy, I needed a picture of that awful day, you can’t just have pictures of your best days right? The next thing I remember was them putting a mask on my face telling me to breath it that I needed to go to sleep and I kept pushing it away and told them no that I didn’t want to go to sleep, it was a fight to put me to sleep, going to sleep was what I was most afraid of. Then 3 hours later I was done! I couldn’t believe it took 3 hours that worried me. But the Doctor said he got everything that he could. He had to leave a little piece that was stuck to the voice box because he got as close to it as he could without damaging the box. He didn’t have to take the lymph nodes in my neck, he took a couple that just came out with the thyroid and one para thyroid came out with it as well. He put the para thyroid back in and attached it to a muscle but it messed up my calcium levels. So after surgery I struggled with the pain and the calcium levels but other than that it went pretty good. They thought the calcium levels had been coming back up but after we got home we got a call from the Doctor’s office saying they actually were going down and they should not have discharged me. This worried me today because my neck keeps tightening up on me and feels like it is strangling me and that is a sign of the calcium being too low. So for now I am on a lot of calcium and vitamin D and thyroid to try and regulate this….it will be a journey! I am way off balance in just about every body function and it is frustrating to feel so horrible, so I am hoping it gets better. I have an appointment back down in Utah on Tuesday, they will tell us the pathology results. If there was any cancer on the back side of the thyroid where the voice box was, where they had to leave that little piece I will have to have radiation, otherwise he was pretty sure it was all contained and he got everything! I can’t wait to hear what the next step is, it is driving me crazy. My kids were all very happy to see me and I was happy to see them. Jaxon was not happy at first and it made me feel terrible but he warmed up to me after a while. My house was all decorated cute by my sister in law Mindy and her kids, that was so nice of them it made my day. I have so many friends and family members who have been so good to me, I am so blessed! My incision is so small compared to how big the Doctor’s here in Idaho make them so I was really grateful for that. I am happy to have it over with and I hope that every day will get better. It is frustrating to not be able to take care of my house or my kids like I always do, but I am doing what I can.  Josh is home with us taking care of the kids right now so that is nice. I wont be able to lift Jaxon for two weeks…..frustrating, but we will work it out and hopefully it goes by quickly.